Baby makes three...

Yesterday we were reading a Dr. Seuss "in utero" story to Junior who apparently quite enjoyed it; with the book in one hand and my other on Hilary's belly, Junior punched/kicked/head-butted my hand in delight. I think it was in delight. Was it ever a hard shot! We've been feeling Junior "kick" for months now, but this was something else. Stay in there, buddy, we're not quite ready! Not much else to report. Dad is coming in three weeks and we will promptly put him to work installing a pair of doors to close off what will become the nursery. The place is filling up fast with all kinds of baby "essentials", with more to come, no doubt!

Posted by julian at 08:06 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

We are into the double digits before arrival. I still remember when that happened on my wedding counter - the first 200 days went so slowly and then the last couple of months raced by! Not much is new this week except a little cramping - I think my insides must be stretching out more. Also, my belly has seriously started to get in my way - sometimes I just forget that I have this half soccerball on my front, like when leaning over to put on shoes. I managed to burn it by leaning over a cookie tray this week because I just forgot how much it juts out! So no stretch marks yet, but two nice jagged burn scabs.

I'm still running - I did go last weekend. I want to try and do it for 2 more weeks before trying something a little more low-key.

Since my entries could easily start to get a little repetitive, I thought that I would try something new this week and do some book reviews. I have read an insane amount of pregnancy and birth related literature - hopefully it's helpful to someone! I've put my favourites closer to the top. If there are any classics I've missed that you enjoyed, I'd love to know.

Pregnancy and Birth: A Month-by-Month Guide to Making the Best Decisions for You and Your Baby by Teresa Pitman
The only one that I would label an absolute must-read. I can't say enough good things about this book. If there's one thing I've learned in my own and my family's forays into medical treatment it's that doctors are like anyone else - some are great, some are not so great. You have to advocate for yourself. Now you are advocating for two! Not all conventional treatments are supported by scientific research - some may even do more harm than good. Others can just cause stress. And some are really, really useful. This book summarises a whole bunch of scientific studies into digestable language and without dictating, helps you decide what decisions are right for you. Along with the scientific data, there are some first-person accounts. Some of those can be a bit preachy - but it's interesting to hear how and why other women make the decisions they did.

Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn by Penny Simkin, Janet Whalley and Ann Kaplen
A really good general reference text - lots of information on very early pregnancy and also on nutrition. The childbirth section is really good too, with lots and lots of information on how it all happens. I'd get this over What to Expect When You're Expecting (reviewed below).

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin
This book is written by one of the most famous midwifes of our time. Much of the book consists of first person accounts of childbirth - I found them really reassuring. Ina May also does a brief history of midwifery and describes techniques and ways she's found to make birth easier.

A Child is Born by Lennart Nilsson
This is a great book of pictures of fetuses in utero. I really loved it earlier in my pregnancy when I was trying to imagine what the baby looked like. Definitely one I flipped through a lot. There are fewer pictures of older fetuses, so I don't look at it quite as often these days. Unfortunately, many of Nilsson's pictures have been co-opted by the anti-abortion movement, and can be found reproduced on anti-abortion sites, but that is not an idea expressed or promoted in the book; Nilsson's photos were originally published in Life Magazine several decades ago, but the book has been updated continually.

The Complete Book of Pregnancy and Childbirth by Sheila Kitzinger
Kitzinger is an anthropologist who's been writing about pregnancy and childbirth for decades, often critically - though this book is more informational that advocational (if that's a word). There is lots of focus on homebirth and waterbirths. I'd also recommend another book of hers, Birth Crisis, for those just wanting to learn more about the problems with many obstetric practices today. However, that's more of an academic text - I read it for a paper - and it focusses mostly on examples in the U.K.

Your Pregnancy Day-by-Day by Sheila Kitzinger
This is a nice journal, though in fact the "day-by-day" is a bit of misnomer - it's organised by weeks, not by days. There isn't a whole lot of substance, but there are lots of first person accounts, which is nice.

Birthing from Within by Pam England and Rob Horowitz
This book is another book, like Ina May's, focussed on actually giving birth. There was a bit too much information on birth art for my taste, as I didn't find that part all that relevant. However, I think that the portions that deal with actually coping with pain and so on will be useful closer to the big day. I'll also recommend some chapters to Julian as there's useful information for partners.

HypnoBirthing: The Mongan Method: A natural approach to a safe, easier, more comfortable birthing (3rd Edition) by Marie F. Mongan
As someone who's interested in natural childbirth, I thought this might be useful. I'd heard positive things about the method from online forums. But the book kind of makes you feel like if you feel any pain or have any worries, you're failing. I liked the Birthing from Within approach a bit better - worrying during pregnancy is natural (and for many of us, unavoidable). But I did like the visualisations on the CD that came with the book and find them very relaxing.

Your Pregnancy for the Father-To-Be: Everything You Need to Know about Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Getting Ready for a New Baby by Glade B. Curtis and Judith Schuler
Not recommended - a lot of the info is just too basic and treats "Dad" like he's not that bright. There are even little boxes that say "In the Doghouse" with tips like "Don't point out that your wife is putting on a ton of weight." The authors might find that cute, but I resent (Julian) being condescended to.

So You're Going to Be a Dad by Peter Downey
Also not really recommended - there were some portions that were kind of useful, but again it treats Dad like a bit of a dunce. It also encourages you not to make a birth plan since you never can predict what will happen! That's completely true, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't state your preferences and make sure that your medical practitioners are making the right choices with you (not for you). The one cool part is that at the very end it contains a few pages of stories of how different people approached parenthood - from the really cautious approach to the kayaking-with-a-newborn approach - makes you realise you have to figure out what works for you. However, Julian is reading it now, so perhaps he is enjoying it more than I did. (To be fair, I only skimmed this one - and it's slim pickings for Dad books, so this could be alright.)

What to Expect When You're Expecting by Arlene Eisenberg, Sandee Hathaway, and Heidi Murkoff
I have mixed feelings about this book. Parts of it are slightly condescending - it really doesn't encourage you to question anything and basically tells you to do whatever your doctors says. As this list may have already indicated, I'm a fan of the "advocate for yourself" approach. Also it can be quite alarmist about certain symptoms - makes you feel like if have a bath or are exposed to the flu, your whole pregnancy is at risk. However, as a general reference text it can be useful to flip through now and then. But overall I'd say, skip the book and use Google instead - it worries me that this book is considered such a bible by so many women since a lot of the information in it is skewed to a very particular viewpoint about pregnancy.

The Pregnancy Bible by by Joanne Stone and Keith Eddleman
Also have mixed feelings on this one. One the one hand I flip to at least once a week to read the weekly updates as it contains great information on what the fetus is up to. It also has great colour photos. On the other hand it contains a lot of information on very rare complications that you can't do much about... I was flipping through the other day and read a passage on fetal hydrops, a very rare, serious condition. This is not information I need to know, and just worries me, so I put it away on the shelf. Also, like What to Expect, it doesn't point out that there are pros and cons to various medical options, like certain testing, and that you should think about those things before deciding what's best for you.

Phew... believe it or not there are quite a few other books I have read, but I will spare you and leave you with these.

Posted by hilary at 09:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Well we skipped right over week 24 - it has been rather busy around here, so I haven't had a chance to update. But that doesn't meet that we don't have baby on the brain more than ever!

I think I have finally hit the elusive honeymoon period. Between you and me, it's only a relative honeymoon. Sure, it's great when I compare it to the crippling fatigue, nausea and migraines of trimester one. But it's not as great as I normally feel. But I am a lot less tired, which is great.

The big new symptom this week has been feet - my feet are suddenly a lot bigger! So some of my shoes don't fit comfortably anymore. Luckily it's summer - time for flip-flops. Also, they just ache more, but I have Julian on massage duty, so maybe that's a perk and not a genuine complaint.

But the main theme of this entry is shopping. Last weekend was a big shopping weekend - we hit up Main Street and I bought quite a nice load of little tiny things, which you can see below. As well, I have been a maniac on eBay over the past couple of weeks. Only a few things have turned up so far, but I expect a flurry of parcel notices. I'm all about the gender neutral colours, but I am mixing it up a bit - a hat with blue and green trucks for our tomboyish girl, or a yellow flowered onesie for our sweet and sensitive guy. I have become well-aquainted with the language of baby clothing, and now know the difference between a onesie and a sleeper and the importance of baby socks. I also got a little baby hoody, which I am very relieved about. I was waking up in the middle of the night worried that the baby might be cold since I couldn't find it a sweater.

Another thing I have been shopping for is diapers. I have stocked up and now have almost everything we need to get started with cloth - all for less than $200 thanks in part to eBay. I have bought cotton diapers and fleece diapers and bamboo diapers - there is a lot of variety out there these days and some of them are so adorable. I just have to get the pins and the pail! It might seem a little strange (at least to Julian) to start these projects soon, but there are so many other things that will need to be done, that I prefer to do them bit by bit before I am enormous and all tired again.

We are trying to keep it minimalistic, but it's amazing how many things there there to get (car seat, stroller, crib, dresser, plus lots of little stuff, like a changing pad) not to mention some minor renos on our apartment which will take some time. So we are holding off on major purchases for the time being, although I did pick up a Moses basket and rocker on Craig's List.

Think someone is going to have a little trouble adjusting to her new role in the family?

Posted by hilary at 07:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Wow - 23 weeks already. I know, I say that every week.

We had another midwife appointment this week, so that was great - there was only one woman in the practice I hadn't met yet, so now I've had appointments with all three. The baby's heartbeat was easily found and was 150. I always get a little nervous right before they find it. My blood pressure was nice and low again, as I had noticed it creeping up just a bit at my last visit and hoped that wouldn't keep heading in that direction.

I also got to discuss the ultrasound. It was almost a month ago but I hadn't been in since then so I never got the result, though I assumed everything was normal since I hadn't heard. The baby seems to be growing well, with a head around the 85th percentile, a body around 75th percentile and thigh length around 56th. So it's got a big head and short legs! But it's completely normal to be a little disproportionate here and there - aren't we all? My impression is that the figures/proportions aren't really indicative of much except that it's growing as it should and isn't completely off the charts one way or the other. The baby is only a pound now (so probably a lot less 4 weeks ago) so there's still lots of growing to do. Let's just hope that head stays in check though!

I also found out that I have an anterior placenta, which means it's at the front. Most people have it at the back. I had suspected it was anterior since I always seem to be a bit lopsided when lying down, and I figured the baby couldn't always be on my right. An anterior placenta doesn't really affect anything, but it is surprising how early I felt the baby - even Julian could feel it by 18 weeks if he was really patient.

I'm finally starting to feel a bit better and have not been so tired this week. Keep your fingers crossed that continues. The midwife had some good recommendations about cutting back on sugars, like juice, as a way to keep fatigue in check. She also warned me to be careful about the way I get up so that my stomach muscles are protected as they can sometimes separate during pregnancy. I am learning to roll like a big beached whale when I get up off my back, rather than using my abs. She also recommended that I take some calcium magnesium to ward off Braxton Hicks, which I have been getting for weeks, so I've been doing that and haven't noticed them so much in the past few days.

I have noticed that the baby has become a lot more predictable in the past few days. If I eat a square of chocolate, which I am inclined to do now and then (hey - it's practically health food these days, right?) I get a lot of kicks. Also, after eating, s/he's pretty active. Before, it was just sort of random.

Anyway I better get to work as I started my bar course today and I want to stay ahead of the game to avoid the last-minute panic I experienced in April. Should be a lot easier now that I am feeling better.

Posted by hilary at 02:21 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

Wow - I can't believe it's already Week 22. We are now just 4 months away from the due date - one small season. The smallest ever baby to survive was born at just under 22 weeks - those are her feet there. (Not that it's optimal of course - babies born that early are at high risk for brain damage and other issues.)

This week has been pretty eventful baby-wise. First, I attended a "Healthy Pregnancy" class, which was included as part of my prenatal classes. I missed the first one, and I wasn't sure how much use it would really be since I've ready about 18 books about pregnancy, so I feel pretty educated. However, I did learn a few good things

(1) I'm allowed to eat sushi! In B.C. apparently the Health Code requires they freeze it before serving it in restaurants, which means that the risk of listeriosis whatever icky thing you get from sushi is so small as to be negligible, so long as the restaurant is "reputable." So yay for that, especially since, er, I already ate some. Only once mind you. But I might need some seconds - though I will be picky; there are quite a few sushi restaurants around that I wouldn't consider reputable...

(2) Exercise - I learned that exercise is not only good for moi, but it is really good for the placenta, as it tones it, just like it does for the heart. Cardio exercise increases oxygen reserves in the placenta, which makes labour easier on the baby. So that was a good motivator as I had taken the week off from doing much of anything; I'm sort of between exercises right now - running isn't quite as enjoyable as my feet hurt when I run, but I haven't gotten around to looking into a pool now that I'm no longer a UBC student. Still I was able to run a 5K this weekend, which was great. An eight-year old did beat me, but still.

(3) Back labour - I learned that sitting reclined can cause back labour because the baby gets into a position with its skull facing your spine. Not so much of a concern now when there's still lots of room in there (a good thing, since I am currently lying on the sofa) but as I get later in my pregnancy I will be more conscious of it, since they become accustomed to certain positions.

Anyway, that's it for the pregnancy class... we also did some babysitting and attended a one-year old's birthday party, which was quite a lot of fun. I changed a diaper, which I hadn't done in quite a while, and was pleased to find it wasn't any more difficult than I remembered. And Julian and I looked at cribs and found one that we really liked, though we have yet to make any major purchases like that.

I'm still having lots of fatigue - I slept 15 hours the other day; and my emotions are definitely very close to the surface - I'm feeling rather thin-skinned, but am able to recognise that it is purely hormonal.

I'm still waiting for the elusive honeymoon stage, but I'm sure it's coming, right?

Posted by hilary at 04:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

Hmmm... may have to rethink this outfit since I didn't realise quite how "Peter Pan" it is. Still, here's the proof that the belly has landed. Got my first seat on the bus yesterday, albeit not without a bit of glaring.

Posted by hilary at 08:13 AM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

Yay - so now we're really and truly at the halfway mark. I just read somewhere that baby's tongue is now fully formed, so that's the milestone this week. I think all the major stuff is pretty much done now, so now it's just the minor stuff like tongues and nails.

We are still debating names; Julian recently ix-nayed one of my favourites, so I will have to head back to the Baby Name Wizard and do some more thinking.

The belly has landed this week - it finally popped. Strangely, teenage girls at a shop where I was trying on clothes last week STILL did not notice I am pregnant, but everyone else says it's fully and truly there.

This week was pretty good energy-wise, but Saturday and Sunday required loads of napping. I attribute that to a growth spurt because when I woke up Friday, the belly was noticeably bigger. I couldn't stop marvelling over it. On Sunday, we saw some friends we'd seen the day before and they said they thought the belly had grown even in those 24 hours.

Sleeping has gotten a bit more painful - all my joints hurt. I need to dust off the prenatal yoga video and do some more stretching.

Ooh - another thing; if our baby is a girl, she already has all her eggs! Which means that if she ends up having a baby of her own, 50% of our future grandchild is already in my tummy. Bizarre.

Posted by hilary at 07:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

This week was very busy as I finished law school today! I finally have my life back, after not having one for the past few weeks... so that's good. It was a particularly stressful period as I let myself get very behind on schoolwork what with the nausea and fatigue and so on.

So I finished school and reached the (technical) half way mark of my pregnancy on the same day. I feel like I'm cheating a bit saying we're halfway, since you're not really pregnant for the first two weeks of pregnancy, plus the baby could be late... but whatever, in textbook terms we're halfway.

There were definitely some good moments this week - the little flutters changed more to flicks - a little stronger. I feel them most days, usually in the evening.

Also, another exciting first - a stranger noticed I am pregnant for the first time. That was on Friday and she remarked on my expecting-ness. But on Sunday we went to a store to buy wool for a baby blanket and they didn't seem to realise it was for us, so it's not overly obvious yet (I was wearing a coat). I think I'm still teetering on the "fat or pregnant?" fence, but definitely leaning more towards pregnant.

We had our ultrasound too, which was another fantastic experience. It was very powerful to see a real baby in there, with tiny hands and feet and even a little chin and nose. It's so amazing to think something human has developed from two tiny cells in such a short period of time.

As for next week, apparently the baby starts to recognise voices from this point forward - so that's exciting. I also think I may finally be crossing the finish line into not being completely and utterly tired - but every time I say that I have another "growth spurt" and wind up napping all the time.

Just felt another great flick! And with that, I'm off to bed.

Posted by hilary at 10:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

This week has been good - there has been a lot of movement recently. The other night, Julian even felt a kick for the first time - he had to keep his hand on my belly for quite a while, but he did eventually get a kick.

I've had a few headaches, but they're mostly in check, I hope. I also got some really bad heartburn for the first time, which is something I never get. But one of the "19-week" guides on the Internet said this is exactly when it appears. I'm writing it down not to complain about it, but just to remember for posterity when various symptoms kicked in. In any case, I have a great book of home remedies which I finally consulted and it suggested grating some ginger in hot water. Seems counterintuitive that ginger would help with heartburn, but it cleared it up immediately, and it had been lingering for 24 hours - so that really works (or else baby finally stopped pressing against my stomach). Anyhow, I ate an enormous cheeseburger for dinner tonight, and heartburn stayed away, so I credit the ginger.

I'm still doing some running, so that keeps me feeling pretty well. I think we have settled on possible names, but we'll be keeping those under wraps for a bit... every now and then I think it might actually be nice to know the sex so we could give the names a trial run, but Julian is deadset against it - he even tried to cover my eyes today during the ultrasound when the tech was in the legs region! I can tell you, there isn't much danger of me being able to tell - I thought the stomach was the mouth!

While I felt a little anxious before the ultrasound, it was absolutely wonderful. We could see baby's hands curled up in front of his face, could see it open its mouth and wiggle its little toes. Julian got to stay with me the whole time, which was great, because at the private clinic we went to for our early u/s, they only let him in after doing the measurements. Baby wriggled around quite a bit. We had a student tech and she took her time, which was nice as it meant more screen time for baby! S/he loves the camera!

The only thing was kind of annoying was that they ended up doing the nuchal fold measurement tests even though we had not requisitioned that part and had not done the maternal blood test that helps interpret them. The test has a high rate of false positive so we declined to save ourself the worry. I thought about piping up, but then I didn't. After all, I don't have to ask for the results.

But all in all they were extremely lovely, and gave us 5 (!) photos of the little one even though we only paid for 1.

Posted by hilary at 02:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

We had our third midwife appointment, which was great. Ha ha, just realised I wrote "we" when it was just me who went... well me and #3!

I thought I hadn't gained enough weight. I feel my face looks very thin. But turns out I've gained 5 pounds in the last month, which is right on target. Yay me.

And of course the best part - hearing the heartbeat. It was 144.

Stay tuned for ultrasound photos - we're having that next week.

Posted by hilary at 04:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Well, I'm pretty sure it was the B-complex that did it - but no headaches since last Monday! A whole week - what a coup.

There has been quite a bit of kicking, or some kind of movement anyway. The other day I called Julian over after a nap to show him how my belly was suddenly a bit lopsided and you could actually see the bulge of the uterus under my belly button. That made him a little squeamish for some reason. He is going to need some acclimatising before birth!

Anyway, you'll be relieved to know I am no longer lopsided. I don't have much of a belly yet - sometimes at night I do, but by morning everything's back down again. So I'm still not getting any free bus seats! Come on baby - I'm counting on you! If you could appear by approximately 7:30 that would be most helpful as the 32 can be quite busy at that time.

This weekend we did the Sun Run - my time was really lousy, but apparently baby on bladder + jogging motion = frequent rest stops. There was quite a line at some of those porta-potties. Anyway, next year we hope to be doing it with a jogging stroller.

Also, while I'm still not having that energy burst everyone keeps telling me about, I will say that I am feeling relatively calm. All those hormones seem to be levelling out, and I am not yet completely freaked out about the fact that I haven't done any work all term and have an exam and 65 pages worth of paper to write in the next two weeks.

Posted by hilary at 06:21 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I'm feeling a lot better these days, more energy et cetera, with one rather major exception. I seem to have a headache every day. And not the back-of-the-mind, you-can-work-through-it ones, but the hurts-to-stand-up ones. I have a lot of headaches in normal life too, though not quite this many. However, in my non-pregnant state they are effectively dealt with by drugs I can't take in my present state.

I'm trying a B-complex and yoga and I may be at the point where I try to cut out refined sugar and other nasties...

Anyway, other than that life is good - I've felt some fluttery kicks a few times - it was only every few days for a while, but yesterday there was a hub of activity. Today's been quiet and I guess regular movement isn't expected for quite a while yet, but it does give me a nice thrill.

Also, I signed us for childbirth classes, which I'm psyched about. Hopefully we will get to meet some other couples having kids at the same time.

Posted by hilary at 06:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Wow - we are now in the second trimester. It hasn't quite been the honeymoon I've been promised so far, what with a bad flu and frequent headaches. But I am sure it will get better.

We had our second midwife appointment the other day, where we got to hear our baby's heartbeat again. It was a nice 148 beats per minute, just as it should be... it really is a wonderful sound! The midwives had a hard time feeling where things were through my stomach, as apparently I have very strong abs! For some reason Julian thought that was very cool.

So far, I am still not really showing - just a little bloated-looking. That's nice on the one hand, as I don't want to buy too many clothes. But I do look forward to the day when someone offers me a seat on the bus - I usually have to stand the whole way.

Posted by hilary at 04:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)