Baby makes three...

We are into the double digits before arrival. I still remember when that happened on my wedding counter - the first 200 days went so slowly and then the last couple of months raced by! Not much is new this week except a little cramping - I think my insides must be stretching out more. Also, my belly has seriously started to get in my way - sometimes I just forget that I have this half soccerball on my front, like when leaning over to put on shoes. I managed to burn it by leaning over a cookie tray this week because I just forgot how much it juts out! So no stretch marks yet, but two nice jagged burn scabs.

I'm still running - I did go last weekend. I want to try and do it for 2 more weeks before trying something a little more low-key.

Since my entries could easily start to get a little repetitive, I thought that I would try something new this week and do some book reviews. I have read an insane amount of pregnancy and birth related literature - hopefully it's helpful to someone! I've put my favourites closer to the top. If there are any classics I've missed that you enjoyed, I'd love to know.

Pregnancy and Birth: A Month-by-Month Guide to Making the Best Decisions for You and Your Baby by Teresa Pitman
The only one that I would label an absolute must-read. I can't say enough good things about this book. If there's one thing I've learned in my own and my family's forays into medical treatment it's that doctors are like anyone else - some are great, some are not so great. You have to advocate for yourself. Now you are advocating for two! Not all conventional treatments are supported by scientific research - some may even do more harm than good. Others can just cause stress. And some are really, really useful. This book summarises a whole bunch of scientific studies into digestable language and without dictating, helps you decide what decisions are right for you. Along with the scientific data, there are some first-person accounts. Some of those can be a bit preachy - but it's interesting to hear how and why other women make the decisions they did.

Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn by Penny Simkin, Janet Whalley and Ann Kaplen
A really good general reference text - lots of information on very early pregnancy and also on nutrition. The childbirth section is really good too, with lots and lots of information on how it all happens. I'd get this over What to Expect When You're Expecting (reviewed below).

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin
This book is written by one of the most famous midwifes of our time. Much of the book consists of first person accounts of childbirth - I found them really reassuring. Ina May also does a brief history of midwifery and describes techniques and ways she's found to make birth easier.

A Child is Born by Lennart Nilsson
This is a great book of pictures of fetuses in utero. I really loved it earlier in my pregnancy when I was trying to imagine what the baby looked like. Definitely one I flipped through a lot. There are fewer pictures of older fetuses, so I don't look at it quite as often these days. Unfortunately, many of Nilsson's pictures have been co-opted by the anti-abortion movement, and can be found reproduced on anti-abortion sites, but that is not an idea expressed or promoted in the book; Nilsson's photos were originally published in Life Magazine several decades ago, but the book has been updated continually.

The Complete Book of Pregnancy and Childbirth by Sheila Kitzinger
Kitzinger is an anthropologist who's been writing about pregnancy and childbirth for decades, often critically - though this book is more informational that advocational (if that's a word). There is lots of focus on homebirth and waterbirths. I'd also recommend another book of hers, Birth Crisis, for those just wanting to learn more about the problems with many obstetric practices today. However, that's more of an academic text - I read it for a paper - and it focusses mostly on examples in the U.K.

Your Pregnancy Day-by-Day by Sheila Kitzinger
This is a nice journal, though in fact the "day-by-day" is a bit of misnomer - it's organised by weeks, not by days. There isn't a whole lot of substance, but there are lots of first person accounts, which is nice.

Birthing from Within by Pam England and Rob Horowitz
This book is another book, like Ina May's, focussed on actually giving birth. There was a bit too much information on birth art for my taste, as I didn't find that part all that relevant. However, I think that the portions that deal with actually coping with pain and so on will be useful closer to the big day. I'll also recommend some chapters to Julian as there's useful information for partners.

HypnoBirthing: The Mongan Method: A natural approach to a safe, easier, more comfortable birthing (3rd Edition) by Marie F. Mongan
As someone who's interested in natural childbirth, I thought this might be useful. I'd heard positive things about the method from online forums. But the book kind of makes you feel like if you feel any pain or have any worries, you're failing. I liked the Birthing from Within approach a bit better - worrying during pregnancy is natural (and for many of us, unavoidable). But I did like the visualisations on the CD that came with the book and find them very relaxing.

Your Pregnancy for the Father-To-Be: Everything You Need to Know about Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Getting Ready for a New Baby by Glade B. Curtis and Judith Schuler
Not recommended - a lot of the info is just too basic and treats "Dad" like he's not that bright. There are even little boxes that say "In the Doghouse" with tips like "Don't point out that your wife is putting on a ton of weight." The authors might find that cute, but I resent (Julian) being condescended to.

So You're Going to Be a Dad by Peter Downey
Also not really recommended - there were some portions that were kind of useful, but again it treats Dad like a bit of a dunce. It also encourages you not to make a birth plan since you never can predict what will happen! That's completely true, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't state your preferences and make sure that your medical practitioners are making the right choices with you (not for you). The one cool part is that at the very end it contains a few pages of stories of how different people approached parenthood - from the really cautious approach to the kayaking-with-a-newborn approach - makes you realise you have to figure out what works for you. However, Julian is reading it now, so perhaps he is enjoying it more than I did. (To be fair, I only skimmed this one - and it's slim pickings for Dad books, so this could be alright.)

What to Expect When You're Expecting by Arlene Eisenberg, Sandee Hathaway, and Heidi Murkoff
I have mixed feelings about this book. Parts of it are slightly condescending - it really doesn't encourage you to question anything and basically tells you to do whatever your doctors says. As this list may have already indicated, I'm a fan of the "advocate for yourself" approach. Also it can be quite alarmist about certain symptoms - makes you feel like if have a bath or are exposed to the flu, your whole pregnancy is at risk. However, as a general reference text it can be useful to flip through now and then. But overall I'd say, skip the book and use Google instead - it worries me that this book is considered such a bible by so many women since a lot of the information in it is skewed to a very particular viewpoint about pregnancy.

The Pregnancy Bible by by Joanne Stone and Keith Eddleman
Also have mixed feelings on this one. One the one hand I flip to at least once a week to read the weekly updates as it contains great information on what the fetus is up to. It also has great colour photos. On the other hand it contains a lot of information on very rare complications that you can't do much about... I was flipping through the other day and read a passage on fetal hydrops, a very rare, serious condition. This is not information I need to know, and just worries me, so I put it away on the shelf. Also, like What to Expect, it doesn't point out that there are pros and cons to various medical options, like certain testing, and that you should think about those things before deciding what's best for you.

Phew... believe it or not there are quite a few other books I have read, but I will spare you and leave you with these.